This  is the nail

Merry Christmas to all our Shed magazine readers and website fans. The Shed is taking a few weeks’ break from posting content but we are hard at it prepping the next issue of the magazine whilst we grab a bit of summer R&R.
Have a great summer holiday and enjoy that extra time now available to you for your special projects. However, before you get stuck into any home maintenance projects, have a quick read of this poem by one of our Shed favourite writers, Rod Kane. You may just decide to have a beer instead.

This is the nail
..that sparked all my fears
Of maintenance imperative, painting, repairs
The portico leaked, just a rusty old nail
But it wasn’t just one, the whole roof was a fail
So up there I goes and a…


This is the nail

This  is the nail
By Rod Kane

This is the nail
..that sparked all my fears 
Of maintenance imperative, painting, repairs
The portico leaked, just a rusty old nail
But it wasn’t just one, the whole roof was a fail
So up there I goes and a thousand comes out
For screws to go in, all shiny and stout
I needed some tools to give me a hand
Airless sprayer, and scaffolding which cost me two grand
Then all the paint, 50 litres in all
The poor little cheque book was starting to pall
I painted the roof, the bargeboards, and spouting
My poor little arsehole was coughing and pouting
When I finished all that the wife was emphatic
”do both the awnings”… I wasn’t ecstatic
I envisioned six weeks, but Oh what a bummer
Not just the holidays, the whole fuckin summer
So the next time a nail falls at my feet
I’ll stand on the bastard and not miss a beat…

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